Mother of murdered son in gay bar slayings finds long-awaited peace in sentencing
A mother finally rests
Umberger, a former political consultant, moved to New York several weeks before his death for his job at a nonprofit.
Although he was relatively new to the city, he quickly developed a list of favorite restaurants he shared with his mom, including Minetta Tavern, the Waverly Inn and Lil’ Frankies.
Clary marked Wednesday’s sentencing at one of her son’s favorite spots, the French restuarant La Goulue, surrounded by dozens of his friends and family. The restaurant is located across the street from the Upper East Side townhouse where Umberger lived—and were he tragically died.
“John was so excited about taking on New York City. And in some ways, ironically with what happened, even though he is not physically here, he took on New York City and he won. It just cost him his life,” she added.
Clary said that one of the most challenging moments throughout the last three years was watching surveillance footage shown during the trail of her son leaving a Hell Kitchen’s gay bar on the night he died.
The footage showed Umberger leaving The Q NYC alone in a car and then returning several minutes later for unknown reasons. He was then seen departing the front of the bar with the men later found guilty for his murder, Hamilton and DeMaio.
“There was something that kept drawing John back to the front of that club. It’s almost like you want to jump out of the seat and scream ‘stop John! Go back home’ and it didn’t happen,” she said. “Seeing how vulnerable he was and by himself. He seemed quite happy to go off with his new friends.”
Umberger’s friends — a diverse group of men and women spanning several generations — described him as a “connector,” someone who can light up a room and befriend any stranger.
At Wednesday’s hearing, Neil Chatterjee, one of Umberger’s friends, reflected on Umberger’s friendly nature.
“You didn’t have to kill him, You didn’t even have to rob him. If you needed money, he would have given it to you. He would have hung out with you,” he said. “Instead you chose to go down the malicious path and now your lives are forever ruined.”
Clary returned home to North Carolina later this week. She said she plans to visit New York periodically and volunteer her time to the LGBTQ community in the near future.
But for now, she will be spending time with her three other adult children, enjoying her new grandchildren and taking care of her 95 year old father, she said.
After three years traveling back and forth to New York, pressing local officials and advocating for her son in the media, Clary also plans to rest.
“There is no doubt in my mind that I will be together with John again,” Clary said.
“God is taking a bad, evil thing that happened and making good out of it,” she added.