How Do I Get My First Love Back?

I have been trying of recent to get over my first love, she was 4years older than me though, but we both seemed to not have a problem with that because we loved each other. But before she agreed on dating me a series of event happened. 

First of all, I'm still in the university, currently in my 100level and she has finished her university and has even served. But just like I said, we seemed to not have a problem with that.

I asked her out for about 6 months before she finally agreed, but a month before she agreed I decided to flirt around a little, then I met someone else, who I liked, and then we started talking to the point that I asked her out and she agreed to be my girlfriend (note, she was also a friend of the other girl) and then a month after the other girl I was in love with agreed to be my girlfriend too.

I was doing okay with both of them when Guilt came in, I couldn't continue with the relationships. And then I told the one I love about everything. She got mad and angry, I told her I loved her more and I was willing to spend the rest of my life with her but I couldn't just break the heart of this second girl, I needed a good reason to do that and I didn't have one at the time, she was disappointed and hurt, I felt it deeply too. I was never a play boy, I never intended it to happen but I have always judge people who have triple girlfriends, without knowing what's really happening. 

To cut the story short, I went to school, and something happened and then I broke up with the second lady, and now I want my first love back, but she seemed to have already move on, she's traveling outside the country soon and she said this and I quote “I might get married before I even come back self” and I have been disorganized ever since. 

I know I was at fault and I know I have lost her already and she has obviously moved on, but how do i get her back? I dream about her daily. Please, I need your sincere thoughts on this. 

Comments Reply
  • In my humble opinion, keep calling her, keep getting in touch. Let her know you still care, if there's a  pet name you do call her while you guys were together, keep calling her that. Let her know your love for her isn't depreciated in any way by what happened. All in all, I believe that 'if its meant to be, it'll be'

    - Taiwo Oluwaferanmi - 2019-09-13 05:44:18 Quote

  • I don't think getting a first love back is necessary I say so because, I'd he/she still loves you, you'll feel it cause there'll still be communication ams concern, but on the other hand, when the person doesn't even reply your texts or pick your calls, then no need to force it

    True love Waits !

    - MILTON PROSPER - 2019-09-13 06:02:10 Quote

  • First love are diamonds. 

    I got same experience as you, if she is someone that stand by her words, am sorry she is gone. We tend to know the value of things when we lose them and that hurts a lot. 

    Write her a few message or letters to reunite with her and moreover distance has consumed her journey. 

    Best is to move on with life. 

    - Taiwo Akinwunmi - 2019-09-13 06:05:18 Quote

  • Since you know you're going to break up with the second lady you shouldn't have told her but if you want to get your first love you should know the right words to use since you guys have been together for a while. You go to her place and go down on your knees confessing your love to her and asking for her forgiveness 

    - Muritala atensinse - 2019-09-13 06:38:43 Quote

  • If you still love her hold on until she is back and proof to her that you are waiting for her to be back, that shows that you still keep your promise. On the other hand, if she gets married before coming back then you have to look elsewhere but the word I might get married before coming is just to scare you away from her. Believe it, hold on for her and continue to pray her you will surely get her back. Give her call on a daily basis and communicate with her, text her and update her on social media she is yours

    - AKIODE OLAOLUWA - 2019-09-13 06:40:07 Quote

  • My dear, I think you should move then because I don't see a life together for the both of you. You said she is older than you and you both did not habe a problem with that then. For that single reason she might never accept you back because she will be telling herself after all you are not her level. Just het other her already.

    - Sylvia Anuforo - 2019-09-13 06:42:34 Quote

  • Getting over your first love can be tough. Your first love teaches you what it's like to be in a romantic relationship. Experiencing anything for the first time sets the tone for how you will engage in such experiences in the future. If you're struggling to get over your first love, this is perfectly normal. This is something most people struggle with, but there are things you can do to help yourself move on. First, limit thoughts of your ex. Try to focus on the present and not dwell on the past. Try to adopt a healthier perspective about the relationship. While it ended, you learned a lot about yourself by being in love. After grieving, try to move forward. Focus on what's ahead of you rather than your lost love. Overcome emotional dependence to get back with a first love You will not convince your first love to take you back by showing them or telling them how destroyed you are! Trust me. All you will do is boost their ego and reinforce the notion that they will be happier without you in their life.

    - Isomkwo Clement - 2019-09-13 07:06:20 Quote

  • Im no relationship expert but if you Loved her and you say she loves you too you should make more frequent attempts to contact her and show her reasons why you love her, dont capitalize on the fact that you messed up, instead show her the positive sides of being with you, what you enjoyed together and all the memories you had. if she dosent see reasons with you then, you already know what to do.

    - Paul Agba - 2019-09-13 07:30:17 Quote

  • I don't think she will ever gives you a second chance.because any lady you find it hard before getting their heart and you later broke up.its not easy to get them back

    She's traveling very soon,this shows she will has no time for you and she will never listening to what ever you have to say.this would be a very big lesson to you and we others,so find someone else and move on.but am sure if you need her help anytime,she will be of help

    - Idiris Opeyemi - 2019-09-13 07:51:19 Quote

  • To be sincere with you dear poster, I think you should move on and I know you can because the Lady is leaving the country and she's right she might find someone to marry there all I can tell you is that you should move on I know you wanted a way to get her back but there are more fishes in the river and you'll find one better than her I'm talking from experience tho

    - Inem David - 2019-09-13 07:59:52 Quote

  • You are to blame my dear! 

    You have a good thing at hand but out of womanizing you lose it.... Well you can go back to her, make her understand that you have left the lady you are cheating her on, also you have to make her trust you again....

    - Olusegun Oluwatosin mercy - 2019-09-13 08:06:31 Quote

  • you have pretty mad the mistake for you own sake just leave leave her and go on with your life.

    Trust me you will see someone who you will love very much more than her. 

    - Ezeh Echezana - 2019-09-13 08:06:42 Quote

  • You messed up big time. But a wise man once said, if you are in love with two people ,choose the second person, because if you were really in love with the first person you would not fall in love with the second person. I don't believe you really know what love is.

    You wouldn't have thrown her away if truly you loved her. I suggest moving on. Your constant dreams about her could just be the guilt you feel from dumping her and nothing more.

    What is done is done. Move on. Yes ,it hurts and nobody ever forgets their first love ,but you have to accept the fact that she too is moving on and move as well

    If she really belongs to you. She will definitely come back to you. Don't fight or push her. Only wish her well

    - Yusuf Abduljalal - 2019-09-13 08:23:08 Quote

  • Maybe she is not meant to be yours right from the beginning,she is older than you and she finished her school stuff already all this do have complications in the future,So maybe you can go and apologize to the first girl that agreed to date you without thinking twice.

    - Aderoju Odunayo - 2019-09-13 08:27:47 Quote

  • Similar issue like this occurred to me recently,  To be honest with you Getting Her back is something really Hard due to the fact that she's travelling soon, so Distance wouldn't make things work fast even if she wants you back and due to the fact that she has moved on, I Guess you just have to let go and move on 

    - Adedokun Adeniyi - 2019-09-13 08:28:35 Quote

  • just tell her everything that happened and don't stop begging her don't just give up because she's traveling out but if it doesn't seem likely again best thing is to go for your second girlfriend again oo

    - Akinade Taiwo - 2019-09-13 08:30:34 Quote

  • I'm sorry to say if she has already moved on you might have finally lost her. Nonetheless you may still keep trying who knows how strong your chemistry with her was before all the current dramas, you may be lucky enough to trigger her forgiveness and love back. All the best bro!

    - Isaac Olalere - 2019-09-13 08:37:10 Quote

  • Distance they say, is not a barrier, but to me, it is a big problem. If she is out of the country already, then all you have to do is call her on daily basis, and let her know you really love her, and she alone. Amd don't do that everyday, so it won't be like a disturb to her.

    - Precious idisi - 2019-09-13 08:48:11 Quote

  • My brother please can you just stop dreaming and face reality, she's already four years older than you and shes moving far ahead of you,to cut the story short too ,you have to chase your dream and move on with love ,you don fuckup be say you don fuckup 

    - Anyaegbu Joseph - 2019-09-13 08:56:18 Quote

  • Well the fault was all yours, u are going to need an actual miracle to get her back, she brought her self down to your level just to fall in love with you and you let her down, u betrayed her trust. 

    - Ibrahim Obipehin - 2019-09-13 08:59:01 Quote

  • Hmmmm. This is so deep..I wount deceived you..since she told you that she have move on.. Its better for you to be a man. And move on yourself.. I know its not easy..I know the memory may still linger on..but if you keep the thought fresh in you it will do you bad and no you too move on....

    - Seyi Darosa - 2019-09-13 09:04:02 Quote

  • Just keep on begging if she really loves you she will accept you back. And try to learn from your previous mistakes not to make them again. 

    - Jesse Ekakitie - 2019-09-13 09:04:05 Quote

  • We all make mistakes sometimes but in this case if she forgives and dosent want you back then take it in good fate . 

    No need to continue this wood goose chase all in the name of first love .

    - Charles Igala - 2019-09-13 09:05:22 Quote

  • I think you should try and get over her because age is not by her side and she can't keep waiting for you let her have a family of her own cos u still have a long way to go. 

    - Okwute Chinecherem - 2019-09-13 09:10:20 Quote

  • Wow the situation is critical, though you can't force her to love you back again, she is probably right for her actions,  all you need to do is let her know you are guity of you deeds and ask for a second chance to make things right. 

    - George Daniel - 2019-09-13 09:11:19 Quote

  • At this point, the only thing you can do is to ask for forgiveness because even if she agrees to get back to you, there are endless possibilities as to what could happen when she travels out of the country. So my best advice is to try and move on, go out more, meet new people, make new friends. You will be alright

    - Olabode Rowland - 2019-09-13 09:15:12 Quote

  • If the two of you are meant for each other then be rest assured that she will come back to you. Just put it in God hand and be sincere and faithful to God.

    - IFEANYI NWOKEDI - 2019-09-13 09:19:39 Quote

  • My dear the truth be told, you cannot get her back. I believe she have moved on with her life also checking the fact that she is older than you and you still have a long way to go before you can settle down 

    - Chinazom Jenny - 2019-09-13 09:20:29 Quote

  • When it  come to love . it exist between two or more peolples. it is not from one sided coins. i will like to find out if the lady in qestion love you in returns. if she did not, please advice to find your own lover who will give you joy in your home

    - Alalade Taiwo - 2019-09-13 09:22:48 Quote

  • Since you guys Love's each other and something just came up, I surgest you keep talking to her, reminding her of your good times, call her, send her morning text, remind her you still love her am sure with this steps she will get to know you truly love her and want to spend the rest of your life with her like you elyer said.

    God help you brother

    - God'stime Chidiebere - 2019-09-13 10:18:53 Quote

  • I advise you move on man.

    You are at fault.. yeah . Double dating is not too good because it leads to something one can't handle. 

    Just move on.... lots of Girls are outside waiting to get you

    - Muheez Oladimeji - 2019-09-13 10:26:15 Quote

  • Matters of the heart:

    The truth is, love is a very complicated issue. Despite the fact that the whole thing that is pointing around the reality of the fact that she is gone and you need to move on. But you still want to be with her. What I will say to you is that if you truly know she has moved on, then, it's time you begin to brood over it, get over her, get on with your life, move on and be a man. Start another relationship and honestly deal with her this time. Learn from your past mistakes and move on.

    Life continues bro.

    - Emmanuel Akinduro - 2019-09-13 10:33:06 Quote

  • Thank God you accepted you are at fault, but sincerely speaking you toiled wity the love she have for you. Anyways, keep on trying on her don't give up easily even though she have moved on, one day she might consider you.

    - Adindu Godsgift - 2019-09-13 10:37:06 Quote

  • Since she has moved on with her life you have to let her go

    Even if you have her back the relationship won't be as it's before because you can't use something that happened at the first time and compare the second time

    - Chioke Sophia - 2019-09-13 10:37:10 Quote

  • You can turn the hands of time, what has happened has happened,you have to learn to move on, is this kind of anger , loneliness, heart break and depression can cause sucide when you think more of the situation. I argue you to be around your friends,go to social event ,just do anything good(not harmful) to forget about it .

    - kachi Simon - 2019-09-13 11:19:53 Quote

  • You can turn the hands of time, what has happened has happened,you have to learn to move on, is this kind of anger , loneliness, heart break and depression can cause sucide when you think more of the situation. I argue you to be around your friends,go to social event ,just do anything good(not harmful) to forget about it .

    - kachi Simon - 2019-09-13 11:20:04 Quote

  • Please brother move on, she is not likely to come back to you anytime soon. Try to keep yourself busy, the one you will love more will come along. Don't beat yourself over someone who has looked beyond you and has moved on.

    - Michael Odewumi - 2019-09-13 11:29:15 Quote

  • Give her some time.. Always be in touch with her... One thing I surely know in this world, what will be, will be and what will not be, will not be... So my dear if she's actually meant for you, never give up, continue fighting till you get her back

    - Goldy Sussy - 2019-09-13 11:35:43 Quote

  • You are in 100 level and she has graduated and served, Bro you really need to look at the handwriting on the wall, every woman dreams of getting married immediately or before she finishes school and you can't offer her that in the next 4 years self, you need to face your studies

    - George Belema - 2019-09-13 12:09:19 Quote

  • Thank God you know that you have lost her. I don't think you can get her back since she have move on. You just have to move on with your life and forget about her. Maybe if she still loves you she can come around. 

    - Ottah Blessing - 2019-09-13 12:16:14 Quote

  • I'm smiling here. My guy, I feel your pain. She has moved on. When a bus leaves you at the bus top, the best thing you can do for yourself is not to cry but get another bus. Get another girl and get your mind off her. But if you insist it must be her, just get stinkingly rich overnight and watch the dry bone of love for you in her life rise again.

    - Joachim Ojimesike - 2019-09-13 12:21:53 Quote

  • Good for u is not everyone that deserve second chance, how could u play with her heart even when u knew she love u too, u went and ask her friend out too, Anyway u just have to move on too and allow the poor lady be 

    - Awajiimam Zalmon - 2019-09-13 12:40:48 Quote

  • This is quite Hilarious. If you want to get her back you have to prove it to her that you're not going to be with anyone else.  You have to make her believe that what happened before won't repeat itself.  If she really loves you back she will try everything possible to get you back too 

    - Victory Isere - 2019-09-13 12:54:00 Quote

  • We should always try not to take the ones that love us for granted. No matter how deeply someone loves you, if you mess up she can dump you and move on without thinking twice. When you lose someone for me the only thing you need to do is by showing her your now a better person and more mature with your reasoning and stay close to them as a friend and as well pray that she sees reason to come back otherwise forget it the ball is no longer in your court. She can only return only if she wants to.

    - TOCHUKWU KINGSLEY OKOYE - 2019-09-13 12:59:08 Quote

  • Well it good you no that that's you have lost her so all i  an say is that keep trying she might just consider back if she still have rooms for you but note You need to face your studies and not disorganized because you are going to regret it later

    - Alexander King - 2019-09-13 13:15:19 Quote

  • First of all I'll say, congratulations for being able to embark on this lust-gone-bad mission. I hope u have learned from this. I advise that you face your studies and be a good buy and build on your CGPA and engage in skill acquisition for now. I know that you are an adult and all of that but... just move on. Thanks. 

    - NDU-ELUWA CHIMELA - 2019-09-13 13:19:47 Quote

  • To realistic this may be a little bit hard to do. I mean to forget her but nevertheless, I will advise you her little space of time to know her final decision after she get there and if it seems aborted, bro move on with your life. The door to relashionship is always open. It's only that of the marriage that is close.

    - Dairo Idowu - 2019-09-13 13:24:41 Quote

  • To realistic this may be a little bit hard to do. I mean to forget her but nevertheless, I will advise you her little space of time to know her final decision after she get there and if it seems aborted, bro move on with your life. The door to relashionship is always open. It's only that of the marriage that is close.

    - Dairo Idowu - 2019-09-13 13:24:42 Quote

  • Guy, ur story is pathetic and funny somehow sha. Just like you've said, you already know you have lost her and i don't think there is nothing you can do bro. You already messed up. You should have handled the case yourself rather than telling her. Dont you know she will be affected? And now you want her to come back. Not really possible. The only thing you can do it to move on with your own life and don't wait for her

    - Adekoya Ayomide - 2019-09-13 13:55:58 Quote

  • Thank God  you  realise  your mistakes, let  her  know that  your  really love  her , and ask  for  forgiveness  of your  past  mistakes. Since she  has  travel  abroad  make  sure  you  call  her  three  time  in a day  and use  sweet text  message  every  day with  this  should  can put  something  into  consideration. 

    - Kehinde Mejida - 2019-09-13 14:01:40 Quote

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