Why I Am Afraid Of Getting Married

I am a girl of twenty two years of age. I'm scared of marriage. Why is it that when a man cheats it's his right but when a woman cheats it's forbidden.

When I was a kid my parents fight alot though it has stop now but it's stuck in my memory. I remember one time my mum went through my dad's phone took his girlfriend's number and called her, she insulted the lady. But to my surprise, the lady told my dad and my dad came home and they both starting quarrelling which leads to both of them beating each other. I was thirteen years of age then.

Recently, a neighbor of ours came to report his wife to my mum and my dad about this same matter, the man was making all sort of threats about how he was going to beat his wife because she doesn't have the right to call his girlfriend. And all my parents could say was tell the woman she is to blame.


Please whose fault is it? Because I'm confused.

Comments Reply
  • We carry the most significant residue of our childhood I understand how you feel but cannyiu still halt any plans for marriage for now you are too young still need some years to understand somethings. 

    As for the cheating its very bad pray you don't marry a cheating husband God bless 

    - Amuta Richard - 2019-10-05 15:54:35 Quote

  • I concur with you. But let us look at it in another way. Cheating in marriages to day is beyond what we think. Do you know that whenever you lie is cheat ? Even if you travel without telling your husband is cheat? So, cheating in either marriage or dating is the same. 

    - Moses Tambaya - 2019-10-05 17:31:49 Quote

  • You have to bear in mind that not all men are the same. It must have been agonizing growing up in such a situation. Marriage is about understanding and trust. It's not right for a man to cheat on a woman but society has made it a trivial issue. But when a woman cheats all hell lets loose. You should not decide not to marry cause of what you have heard or witnessed, just pray for God's assistance. He would guide you and hopefully you'd get married to a man who respects and loves you so much.

    - Ifechukwu OFFORNEJELU - 2019-10-05 18:04:09 Quote

  • We really remember our childhood memories so well that we cant seem to forget it, but I advice you to move on ,don't be afraid of something,just have faith and pray over it that your s is going to be better

    - kachi Simon - 2019-10-05 18:17:14 Quote

  • Truth is whoever cheats is wrong, either the man or the woman. Most of us have had experiences as kids in which the husband is always perceived to be right, but truth is it is wrong. Anyways that shouldn't scare you because the fact that other's cheat doesn't mean that you and your spouse to be would.

    - Kabiru Sadiq - 2019-10-05 18:27:23 Quote

  • You shouldn't allow what affect you parent to affect your thinking, all you can do is change your mentality and be positive, go to marriage chancellor and they will give yiy advice, so also be vigilante and pray before going into marriage.

    - Alamu Olayinka Abass - 2019-10-05 19:12:48 Quote

  • First off, cheating is nobody's right ma'am. In a true relationship bonded by love, responsibility and obligations come in. One of which is loyalty and trueness to partner. Whether male or female, its nott right in any way to hurt the trust and love in the relationship.

    Next, I'll like to say that we kinda live in an environment whether people are so judgemental and quite shortsighted in their decisions; using culture, religion and even government as excuses. So itsi important to know that what's right is right and what's wrong, has no other name.

    Finally, do not be afraid to marry. What happened to Taiwo may not happen to Kehinde. You just try well to look for a wonderful partner, someone with whom you won't be afraid to spend the rest of your days with.

    - Farihan Sodiq - 2019-10-05 20:03:38 Quote

  • Well, I think they are both at fault, lack of contentment made the husband looked elsewhere for an affair, as for the wife insulting her husband's girlfriend over the phone isn't a smart idea... 

    - Daniel Temiloluwa - 2019-10-05 21:41:32 Quote

  • Cheating in a relationship cannot be one-sided. Even though cheating is significant in the world today, it should not be one of the reasons one would not want to get married. The main thing is to find the one that truly loves you and you're good to go.

    - Uche Ebube - 2019-10-05 22:36:03 Quote

  • This issue of cheating in marriage is really destroying so many marriage, and it has made our young girls they are now afraid of marriage, does it mean one woman can't be enough for one man, why is it that you must cheat to get satisfied, I see no gain in cheating let focus on what we have and stop looking for outside.. 

    - Igwe Francis - 2019-10-05 23:35:52 Quote

  • Everything that God created is good including marriage. The fact that some people are experiencing hell in their marriage doesn't mean that marriage is bad. Just be good and be you and hope for the best in any relationship you are into or any new relationship that you intend entering. 

    - NDU-ELUWA CHIMELA - 2019-10-06 00:45:15 Quote

  • The issue of cheating in marriages today, can’t be overlooked or kept aside. But it should not be the reason to avoid marriage, but instead it should make us to make the right choice and marry out of love and not other selfish interests. A marriage which is bound in love will not experience cheating.

    - Onekeneke prince - 2019-10-06 12:24:35 Quote

  • In marriage it is known that the cheat is always wrong but that shouldn't make you to be afraid of getting married.

    The best thing you habe to do is to meet a marriage chancellor who will tell you what to do to prevent such occurance in your family again.

    - Emmanuel Ojimba - 2019-10-06 18:05:59 Quote

  • I think you scared because of the things youve seen or heard about marriages.....

    Nevertheless,all men arent the same 

    But before u leap make sure you look nd pray over it

    - Juliet Eke - 2019-10-06 19:02:38 Quote

  • Yes the wife is to be blame,  cause man has to power to marry many wife, but it is wrong  for a woman to have many husband(not even sensible)  so you don't have to avoid  marriage cause when you are with the right guy he won't even think of cheating on you 

    - ayomide Ayomide - 2019-10-06 19:24:02 Quote

  • You don't have to sacred of getting married because when both of you love each other and be prayerfull because devil always find where is settled and have is in mind not body is willingness 

    - Adeola Ayomitunde - 2019-10-06 19:37:54 Quote

  • The woman is at fault because in the first place she should not have check or talk less of calling the lady because you husband will always be inform and come back fighting and the home will not be at peace and also the woman didn't need to give herself high blood pressure. Let her be calm 

    - Abioye Damilola - 2019-10-11 23:01:47 Quote

  • You must know that marrying is part of what God sent us to do in life as we have it in the religion both in the Qur'an and Bible and the key I will give you is that: "do pray that God should make your spouse a blessing and not a trial also, It is better to wait long than marrying wrong person". With that, you are good and have it in mind that all men are not the same and seek for your right partner because it is a lifetime journey, no returning!

    - Badmus Usman - 2019-10-11 23:16:55 Quote

  • It's normal to be scared of marriage and it's worse with the trauma attached with it, seeing yoit parents fight must've been hard and a really traumatic experience for you

    But then I believe that you can't possibly make the same mistakes that your parents made

    Be open to communication, talk about things with your spouse, it actually reduces the chances of cheating

    - David Akpabio - 2019-10-12 19:13:52 Quote

  • A sad story indeed but you can make your future by yourself. You dont have to use you parent act to conlude about marriage, all couples are not the same

    - Edmund Samuel - 2019-10-13 10:17:09 Quote

  • Probably it's because of your insecurities about men and ur past experiences..what you just need to do is open ur mind and heart,enjoy life,I assure  you there is a good man out there and where you look matters(environment).

    - Moul Ayibapreye Prisca - 2019-10-14 13:41:02 Quote

  • You are being hunted by the excesses in your family and I don't know why you suddenly inherited a problem that is not yours....you are still young now and don't worry about marriage you need to reprogramme your mind first because if you don't you will end up in your fears.

    - Destiny Ehidiamhe - 2019-11-23 21:42:10 Quote

  • From my own point of view, I will advice ladies to stay away from there spouse phone, checking of ur spouse is now very common which is the cause of broken marriages

    Both of them are at fault because it's right to cheat on ur wife and the wife also should stay away from her husband's phone if she can do that I believe peace will reign in the house

    - Oyedeji Hikmot - 2020-01-29 23:12:11 Quote

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