‘The Conjuring: Last Rites’ Review: Last Rodeo, Last Fumes

Ever ride a roller coaster so many times it loses its thrill? I wouldn’t know — I hate roller coasters. 

Still, that’s how it felt watching “The Conjuring: Last Rites.” 

“Last Rites” marks the fourth and final “Conjuring” film spanning 12 years and the ninth entry in the so-called “Conjuring” universe (there were five spinoffs, so clearly a fruitful franchise for Warner Bros.). The films follow real-life paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren, played once again by Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga, with each film based on one of their cases. “Last Rites” centers on their final case.

We revisit the Warrens in 1986, giving a lecture about their work in a near-empty auditorium. The few college students who bothered to attend were more fixated on cracking “Ghostbusters” jokes. At this point in their careers, the Warrens had stepped away from investigations — Ed insists it’s merely a “hiatus” but hates to admit it’s to prevent another heart attack. 

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Patrick Wilson as Ed Warren and Vera Farmiga as Lorraine Warren in New Line Cinema’s “The Conjuring: Last Rites,” a Warner Bros. Pictures release. (Giles Keyte, courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures)

The film, however, actually begins with a flashback in 1964 when Ed and a very pregnant Lorraine pursue their first demonic case, finding them in an antique store where they come across a haunted full-length mirror with three creepy babies carved at the top. Feeling an evil presence, Lorraine gently touches the glass, which immediately cracks, and she instantly goes into early labor. They rush to the hospital and Lorraine delivers a stillborn child. Moments later, as Lorraine desperately prays to God with her lifeless baby in her arms, the baby suddenly lets out a cry. Ed and Lorraine welcome their miracle child, Judy. 

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Meanwhile, in “present day” West Pittston, Pennsylvania, the lives of the Smurl family are turned upside down after Grandma and Grandpa unwittingly give their adolescent granddaughter the same possessed mirror for her confirmation gift, and still with the crack no less! Don’t worry though, they say the glass can be replaced. Why they didn’t replace the glass themselves before gifting the mirror or hand their granddaughter some cash instead is anyone’s guess.

Like any haunted house flick, the paranormal activity begins subtly; a candle blowing out, a toy doll moving on its own, a mysterious figure lurking in the shadows, but when the light turns on it’s just a poster of John Wayne. You know, the usual stuff. Things get worse for the Smurls after the two teen daughters throw away (or at least attempt to throw away) the ugly mirror. 

Kila Lord Cassidy as Heather Smurl in New Line Cinema’s “Conjuring: Last Rites,” a Warner Bros. Pictures release. (Courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures)

“Last Rites” has a bloated runtime of 2 hours and 15 minutes, yet the Warrens don’t even arrive in West Pittston til nearly an hour-and-a-half into the film. That’s because much of it focuses on Judy (Mia Tomlinson), who has the same gift/curse of sussing out ghosts and demons as her mother, but lacks the skills to fend them off. This eventually leads to Judy and her parents teaming up “Avengers: Endgame” style to defeat the demon that has haunted them and the Smurls once and for all in a not-so-climactic battle. We also spend a lot of time with Judy’s boyfriend Tony (Ben Hardy) as he desperately seeks the approval of her parents, but don’t count on him for much as far as demon hunting goes. He’s kinda useless. 

Farmiga and Wilson remain the heart of “The Conjuring” franchise and carry “Last Rites” across the finish line — just barely. Here, Farmiga brings more emotional weight as Lorraine struggles with the constant burden of protecting Judy from the literal demons that haunt them. But the heightened family drama came at a cost. 

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Good horror depends on memorable scares. The first “Conjuring” film nailed that with its dread-inducing “hide and clap” scene. By contrast, “Last Rites” delivers half-hearted scares you’ll struggle to recall once the credits roll.

One could chalk it up to poor writing — or uninspired direction. Michael Chaves returns to the director’s chair (following 2021’s “The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It” and the 2023 spinoff “The Nun II”), living in the shadows of his franchise predecessor James Wan, who is only credited as a producer. Wan was a visionary commander behind the camera while Chaves was simply on autopilot. 

Vera Farmiga as Lorraine Warren and Mia Tomlinson as Judy Warren in New Line Cinema’s “The Conjuring: Last Rites,” a Warner Bros. Pictures release. (Giles Keyte, courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures)

The Verdict:

“The Conjuring: Last Rites” serves to wrap up Ed and Lorraine Warren’s story, but it’s not the epic conclusion that it’s billed to be. The absence of genuine frights leaves their final chapter also the weakest. For horror fans out there, only the first two installments are worth your time. 

★★ – SKIP IT

“The Conjuring: Last Rites” is rated R for bloody/violent content and terror. Running time: 2 hours, 15 minutes. In theaters now.

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